I then signed up to the Newport marathon with my new running friend, Ally. Training was going relatively well, except for getting the flu at the start of the Christmas period. I was so ill, that it ruined my Christmas and my daughters 2nd Birthday entirely. After that, I completed my 17 mile training run in March. I was in agony with my left knee in the last 4 miles. It had been playing up an awful lot since I started marathon training. I self diagnosed it as ITB syndrome and put my weak glutes down as a reason for the potential flare up. After I finished in pain, but happy of the achievement I opened my phone to be told our gym was to be closing in accordance with GOVT guidelines over Coronavirus, just that Monday before I was told that they we not going to keep the 24hr gym open, whihc meant my night job hours were to be gone. I was in a state of limbo thinking i was jobless, but my manager said to leave it with her. Since then, its taken a while to develop into a full furlough hermit, and there is no way can you define what a 'normal' way of living is anymore. Not going to lie, I have really enjoyed the family time, as Jake was too furloughed, and has only just gone back this week. Newport has been cancelled for a second time. Originally scheduled for April, then October. I sincerely doubt i'll get a running event in anytime this year.
So I made a target of walking 10,000 steps a day for a whole month (I did so successfully). I even got my bike back from my Mums and cycled around the beautiful countryside, I ran 4-5 miles every other day. I was determined to not become a couch potato with this lockdown. I decided that training through the summer for a October marathon was not my thang. As I've said many times before, I'm sooooo not a summer runner. As a result, I sold my marathon place, and wanted to focus on the new date for the Coventry Half in November.
I think everyone can collectively say it has been a crap 2020. But for me, there was a light at the end of the tunnel. On 21st April, I went for a run. Albeit, through some public footpaths (farmers fields, over sties). I dismissed my utter lack of pace due to the different terrain. The wind was blowing, it wasn't hot. When it spat me out to a road I knew, I realised, Ah this is all downhill. it'll be a breeze until I get to Ratcliffe Road. Perfect. Not a week before on this stretch of road I ran a 9:35 minute mile, I felt strong. But suddenly I felt energy-less. I was running a 12 minute mile according to my Garmin, and my heart rate (going downhill) was rocketing. This was not normal, I thought. I was a day late for my period. Not unbeknown for me, I could go 3-4 days sometimes. I had all symptoms of an impending period, but alas she didn't bleed! I noticed my urine looked strange, not cloudy, but like a haze of oily stuff on top which was again, strange. My tatas looked mahoosive too. I sat and played Call Of Duty for a couple of hours trying to piece together what was going on with me. I had a Sunday Dinner the week before and awoke to a funny metallic taste in my mouth. I dismissed it cause I was a tramp and forgot to brush my teeth. I blamed the beef having been between my teeth for 12 or so hours. I remembered I had a digital Clear blue test for emergencies only. Whats the harm in taking it. I was so sure it would be the same old negative response.
Its important to note that me and Jake, once we had gotten over the horrors of the newborn, no sleep stage indeed agreed we wanted another, eventually. With me being an only child, and Jake being one of 4, I seen how close they all were. I didn't want Freya to be an only child. I was spoilt to shit being an only child. My Mum and Dad made sure I didn't want for anything. The best thing was i didn't have to share with no mofo. But then again, I remember how lonely it was at times. Not in the years when Martin and Mum were together, Martin is more of a kid than me, and would invest a lot of time playing video games after work with me and doing general stupid kid stuff. Me and Mum started horse riding and eventually got Guinny which made us closer than ever before. It was more after they split that I thought that I could have done with a sibling. The teenage hormones settled in, and all the different emotions had developed more prominently, along with exam pressure etc... My friends all had sibling. Most my cousins on both sides all had brothers and sisters, that they were close to bar one other on my Dads side. Just not me. Haha!
We decided to start trying in June 2019. I was in tears when aunt flo came every month after the first 3rd months of trying. I was monitoring my periods on an app, doing it around the right time and pissing on ovulation tests a week after my period to pin point when my egg was likely going to be released. I felt I was broken. I knew of people having their first and then they near enough straight away conceived with their second. I was wasting money on pregnancy tests left, right and centre and just being utterly disappointing when it came up negative. Jake was reassuring, saying if we've had Freya, we were likely to be blessed with another at some point. To peoples utter surprise, it took me and Jake 3 years for Freya. Although we weren't technically trying. I thought it would never happen, that one of us had some sort of fertility problem. I obviously didn't go round telling people this, as we were so young when we got together. We were still so naive. People would call us stupid for having unprotected sex. I found that the pill was causing me to get excruciating and constantly reoccurring UTI infections. So, I stopped taking them, the UTI's stopped and that was it. But its all good, Freya came at a good time in our lives. We were still young to some, but the timing was just perfect!
Okay back to that night. It was approaching 12:30am at night. Who in their right mind decides to take a preggo test at that time of night?! This dickhead, that's who!!! I slipped the cap on, looked away for 3 minutes and tadarrrrrr, the word 'Pregnant' appeared. I generally thought I'd be over the moon. Well I thought it definitely would be less of a shock than when I did the one with Freya. But nope, no tears of immediate happiness, it was panic. I ran downstairs to Jake who was gaming online with his brother and friends, I pulled his headset back and put the test directly in front of the computer monitor. Jake, also in shock calmly stated on the mic, "Yo guys, hold up my Missus is pregnant again". I ran upstairs and tried to call my Mum, she was obviously asleep. So the next point of call was my Sissy in law who answered and calmed me saying "Look, go to 2 different shops when you're 4 days late, and then re do them to make sure you haven't got some strange fake positive". I couldn't sleep the whole night. The tears of joy eventually came in floods, and my Mum rang back a 3am after having woken up downstairs, exceedingly groggy and said "Babe, this could have waited till the morning, but congratulations! Goodnight. I love you" Aha. Sorry Momma. I got a test from Lloyd's and Superdrug, as well as some some Folic acid and took them one after another and.... Nope. I definitely was pregnant!!
I decided to tell my Dad earlier this time. I think he took it so,so well. Ultimately, I believe he was gutted because I was due to start my Primary PGCE at Birmingham City Uni this September. There is still time Paps. This was also one of my disappointments actually. I decided that March was to be the last month we'd try. I'd get the coil re put in ready to gain a career. Things really do happen oddly don't they? Do I regret it. Nope. The Uni reassuringly said that all I have to do next year is re apply, email them and they'll instantly give me a unconditional offer again without having to go through their interview process. Winner, winner chicken dinner. But I'm still quite overly optimistic that i'll feel ready to reapply in a years time. After all, the Baby will only be going on 7ish months and child care is expensive. But I suppose I'll make the decision when the time comes.
Lastly, we're having another December baby. What makes is so significant and special to me is that the due date is the 24th December, which most know as my Nan's death anniversary. I definitely think she sprinkled some baby dust over us from up there!
